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October 19, 2007

Just A Little Panic

While getting ready for work, a news/weather alert came across the television advising that a tornado warning was in effect until 11 p.m. Can you see my face? Not just in effect but affecting every county around me: Madison, Fayette, Dyer, Tipton, Lauderdale, Shelby. The map showed virtually a straight line from Arkansas right through my Lauderdale County and beyond. Now hold on, wait a minute. I didn't bargain on tornadoes. Sure, they have occurred in the DC area recently and I know this section of the country gets them but this was a little close for comfort. Not that I had any say in the situation.

Off to work. So organized. Hair done, lunch packed, badge, jacket (in case it got cool), cigs, I'm ready. AND early. Pull in the pooch, fresh water; everything is locked up tight. I'm off. Hit the parking lot -- no badge. Nowhere. Not in the pocket, attached to the shirt, in the lunch pail (yeah, for the 30 min. lunch days, a lunch is necessary), pocketbook, NOwhere. This is what comes from being organized. I've spent up my extra time searching high and low in the car. Told by an employee that they'll make another badge in HR. Cool. Am I embarrassed? Yes.

See I got in trouble again about lunch time. What now? They gave you a copy of the meal guidelines. I know...but it didn't say you couldn't go to lunch late, which I did. Not on purpose; not being obstinate. I was in the middle of a job and it took me 30 minutes past my scheduled time. I figured that as long as I got it in immediately, everything was copasetic. Not. I found out that going to lunch late is a very serious no-no. I don't know if this is only applicable to the great state of Tennessee but Wally World gets a hefty fine if employees don't eat within a 6-hour period. The state audits their records. Hmmm. All those times in DC and Maryland without a lunch.... And now here I come with no badge. Color me RED.

First assignment? Load the trailer? Got to find me a better job. Seriously, no big deal. There were a few light boxes that had to be taken from the back room out to the storage trailer where housewares overstock is being housed. All of the holiday items are coming in and they're not ready to put them up in that section. I mentioned to Miss T the other day that pallets of holiday items arrived the night before and asked where should they be stored. She is so silly. It would have been really easy to say that the store has a trailer or storage area outside where the items are stored. Not. "Just leave them." I knew that much, particularly since I hadn't been told where they went.

My favorite head-cashier, Alice, approached. I'm starting to dread seeing anyone from the cashier area. Yep. Would I relieve the greeters? NO! I told her that it was cruel and unusual punishment and that I was lodging a complaint with the State Department concerning their torture tactics. While on my post, the sky darkened, the wind picked up and all hell broke loose.

Now boys and girls, I can take wind (although I was very worried about those huge trees at the house) and I can take mega-downpours but when the lights went out on the parking lot and started flickering inside....? Add hail to the mix and, now, I am concerned. What about that roof at the house? What about the electricity? What about Piss-Ant? Figured she was scared shi*less. The storm subsided, only to return with renewed vigor. The light show as it moved on was fabulous. To ease your mind, no tornado touched down in Ripley. Serendipity still stands. Understand that it did some damage in Arkansas. And NewWave took a hit...no phone,cable or internet until this morning. That's okay. I needed the rest.

As for Piss-Ant? She was not scared shi*less. She has developed the very annoying and bad habit of going in the wee hours. Even after being outside all day, no food after noon, walks when I come in, and serious ***whippings. Somebody give me a solution, please. She is on her way to being a short-timer.

The badge? On my bed.

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