Ask Me! Please!

What are you talking about, Missy? $20 million to stay home. That's what the Packers are offering the retired, not retired, just want to play, Brett Favre. Brett, Brett. They don't want you, boo. They're not saying that you can't play--last season showed that you've still got it--they just don't want you to play with them (or anybody). Now, I've been in places where they didn't want me either but no one offered me a dime to stay home. Take the money, Brett. Then send a li'l sumpn, sumpn, this way. I'm begging to stay home.

The annoying pundits on Fox & Friends had someone on who was touting the success of that ridiculous McCain ad featuring Brittany and Paris. Went on and on about how it was on the cutting edge, made people talk about his presumptuousness (read that as arrogance), brilliant! Just brilliant! Now ask me. Are you kidding me? It was stupid! Infantile! To quote someone else: "Is this the best you can do?" Sheez. His whole campaign staff needs to be fired.

By the way, "annoying" covers all of those "news" programs whose format is to put together a bunch of people to deliver the news and their views with such saccharine camaraderie, love, HUMOR. The very best of friends. Those forced cackles of laughter or screeching as they scream to be heard, from the females in particular, is more than annoying. It is irritating. Just give me the damned news. In a fair and balanced manner, of course. But back to Fox cable, their motto is "fair and balanced." Balanced? Where is the balance? So why watch it? Every now and then they pick up an item that is not being covered elsewhere. Plus, with their balance and the off-balanced views of everyone else, I just might be able to find a nugget of truth in there, somewhere.

The Enterprise finally let the good citizens in on the massive construction project that took place. That's right: took. You see, by the time the trees were falling and earth was being displaced in my neck of the woods, the project was in the final stages. It is now completed. New sewer pipes to better serve the community. How's that for keeping you on top of things?

And thank you, cuz, for tipping me to the piece on the major drug bust in my old neighborhood. Good grief! Dealing out of a policeman's rental? And he didn't know about it? R-I-G-H-T!!!! You know it was major when the footage only showed my very good friends at DEA. Sheez, they were doing a thriving business. Folks just hopped on and off the bus out front, I guess. Location. Location. Location. I bet the new neighbors were 1) giving high fives or 2) having hissy fits. RLMAO. Didn't see anything about it on the 3D listserve, though. No press release from Chief Cathy or Councilman Graham. Hmmm, maybe because they couldn't take credit.

I'm toying with applying for a position as Executive Director for a project in Ripley. Okay. I'm no longer toying; I am overhauling my resume and enlisting aid for editing cover letters, etc. Now you know I've got the creds. What I don't have is the hook. To my way of thinking, I would be a good bet because I don't have any ties to anyone. But politics being local--I'll stand a snowball's chance in hell. We'll see. Proverbs 3:5-6

Got introduced to the horrors of a tax free weekend and back to school shopping. Lawd a mercy! There are some thieving folks down here. Found box cutter blades and empty containers. One enterprising soul took Wally's scissors and cut open a digital camera case. Backpacks filled with merchandise; school uniforms walking out the door with salesmen in hot pursuit. One associate totaled up over $200 in lost merchandise from the Sporting Goods department, alone. Seems that management needs to have full security in force for these events.

And ask me, please, why didn't I have a tighter grip on Ms. Floozie, aka Cindy, last night when bringing her in. Girlfriend had been planning her escape for a long time. She felt the slack in my grip and was off to the races with Dufus bringing up the rear. He came back; she kept going. Just checked out back and she's flopped out, sleeping off the effects of a night on the loose, no doubt.

Hall of Fame game tonight. Not only did 'Skins fans finally get to see Art Monk installed in the HOF but Darrell Green, as well. Whoo Hoo! You know where I'll be. Don't call me.