Help!

See I need all the help that I can get.  Why is that, Missy?  'Cause it is mighty hard to keep my mouth shut when folks are determined to upset the day. 

Yesterday wasn't payday in the Big Rip, Mother's day, food stamp day, or any other significant day as far as we could figure but everybody in the county was shopping for food.  And shopping big!  I have never bagged so many $500 orders and my poor shoulder knew it.  Maintained a 500 iph (items per hour) average for most of the day.  I'll explain that later.  But along with the mega orders came the mega (read "petty") requests.  Note to customers:  1) if you want your items bagged in a specific manner, please separate them to meet your request.  DON'T leave it to me to figure out what you want placed in a specific bag.  "Divide them equally" just doesn't cut it.    2)  Most cashiers (note that I said most) bag chemicals, body washes, etc., apart from the food items.  Your vitamins are sealed; therefore, being placed in the bag with soap, etc., won't affect them.  If you want them bagged with the food, place them with the food.  Likewise, if you want them bagged separately, say so.  3)  Use a damned calculator to figure out how much you've purchased so you'll know how much is available on the food stamp card.  Trucking half a basket of groceries back to customer service is unfair to the next customer purchasing that food which has been left unrefrigerated or the folks in line who had to wait while you figured out what to put back.  That phone which you just cannot put down has a calculator function.  Use it. 4) Your kids may be cute but not when they are pushing the bag rack while I'm trying to fill the bag.  Just a little supervision would be appreciated.   5)  WIC users--don't let me start ringing your order and THEN you produce the voucher.  Please.  And since you know that you have to sign the voucher...where is your pen?  6)  Food stamps?  I'm not one of the lucky ones so I don't know a damned thing about them.  What you can and cannot buy; how much is left on your card; or any of the rest of it.  And what is so hard about getting a new, readable, card?  To replace the broken, worn card that you wave so proudly while your wallet is packed with cash and other credit cards? 

IPH--items per hour--is used to assess your productivity.  I'll leave it you to research how it is calculated, yada yada.  Naturally, Wally tracks that and your scanning percentage.  If you are at a register that doesn't get a large amount of traffic, then the IPH can be low. Conversely, the more traffic, the higher the IPH.

Lord, please help keep a muzzle on my tongue for the coworkers who feel free to criticize my hairstyle or anything else. See, we don't know each other that well.  Yep, looking a little bit like Shirley Temple and not necessarily a style that I would have chosen.  However, don't let me have to remind you that the Jheri Curl went out of style over 20 years ago.  Or, that if you must wear it, you need to keep it up.  Trimmed and oiled, or whatever it needs, so that you won't look as though you're wearing a very old, very much used, dust mop on your head.  Don't let me go there, please.

So here is my prayer for today.  Dear Lord, you know that it will be a very long day for me.  I humbly ask that you keep me in the safety of your arms.  Let an air of serenity and peace surround me.  Give me the wisdom to overlook the pettiness of others and the ability to keep my mouth shut. 

Be safe.  Be Blessed.